My Self destruct button

I have this problem in my life. Its not life threatening, but it is influencing the rest of my life. Its called self destruct. I manage to get myslef into such a worked up situation while thinking about and trying to change little things. I really do "sweat the small stuff". Sometimes I start a chain of thought about the smallest insignificant things, and it spirals out of control so fast that I end up not sleeping coz I am thinking about it so much, and thinking of alternatives. All of this is of course happening in my head. I suspect that this comes from the fact that I have a specific formula in my head for everything and everything MUST work according to this formula, and if it doesn't, I start to worry and wonder what is wrong and what is the matter with me, or the situation. I don't know where I got this formula-for-everything attitude, but the problem with it is I can't stop it. After a while I get so upset and moody about little things that it potentially can ruin a good friendship, a good job, a devoted Christian background. Yet I keep on doing it, knowing it can explode and kill me in an instant.

Its like having a big, red self destruct button in your hand, and someone told you you are not allowed to push it.....EVER. Then after a while the urge to push it gets to you and yo push the button expecting the worst, but then you realise that it didn't kill you, it just self destructed your car maybe. You think "that's not too bad, I can get another car", so next time when the urge grabs you, you remember that it only blew up your car, so you think you can push it again, it will just blow up something else. Then you do, and it does. The problem with this is it is only a matter of time until there is nothing else to blow up, and the next time you bush the button waiting for something to blow up in the background, you find yourself in hundreds of pieces all over the floor.

I need to either get rid of my big red button, or just learn to control my urge to push it. How the hell do I do either if it is already such a part of my being???